My Day at the Dentist

I was sitting in a deck chair, just a bit reclined, on a beach.  It was a long, wide, sandy beach fringed with palm trees.  I took a sip of mango juice and looked out at the ocean.  There were just a few boats, their white sails bobbing along.  There  were beautiful  women  sunbathing.  There were people playing frisbee.  Everybody was very fit.  I was very fit, which was strange.  There was a tall, skinny man with dreadlocks playing a steel drum, a fun, little, happy tune.  Some people were dancing.  There was a group of children, riding unicorns, slowly crossing the beach.  Suddenly, I realized that I didn’t know where I was, or who I was, how I’d gotten there or how long I’d been there.

Is it safe?

“Hmpf,”  I thought.  “I’ve had this before.  Drugs will wear off and I’ll remember.”  I sat back and soaked in the view, and the sounds of the day.  Still, it bothered me.  In the  movies, when somebody can’t remember who they are or how they got to where they are, it’s because they’re a secret agent with mad martial arts skills, and that would be cool.  But, in real life, it’s usually disassociation caused by some traumatic incident.

Either way, no hurry.  I waited a few more minutes, then I signaled a passing waiter.  “Excuse me, this may sound like a strange question but, how long have I been here?”

“Just about 15 minutes.  You’re done now,” and he  reached over and touched the middle of my  forehead and it all was gone.

“That’s it,” the  dentist said.  “Come in for a checkup in 6 months.”

That’s the scenario I imagined while I was actually in the dentist’s chair today, gripping the edges of the chair like a first time flier gripping the armrests, white knuckled with fear, hearing the whirring of the drill and having flashbacks to ‘The Marathon Man’ and the dentist I had as a child, from as young as I can remember until the time I left home and in that decade and a half  the guy definitely should have retired at some point because his hands shook and that is really, seriously not a good thing for a dentist.

Can’t complain.  Although I’m terrified of dentists, it wasn’t so horrible.   She replaced two fillings that had fallen out, one more than I’d been aware of, it did only take about 15 or 20 minutes and, this being the Czech Republic, it didn’t cost me anything.

Still, I wouldn’t have minded the hypno-holodeck experience and I hope the dentists of the future have it.