Bristol Palin Says She Was Date Raped, Sort Of

She doesn’t use those words, exactly, but in her ghost written (Nancy French) biography entitled “Not Afraid of Life: My Journey So Far”, she writes about the evening that she lost her virginity, when Levi shtooped her for the very first time.

Bristol Today

It was on a camping trip and apparently she’d kicked back quite a few wine coolers because the next morning she woke up alone in her tent with no memories of what had happened as Johnston talked with his friends on the other side of the canvas.

Now, there’s nothing illegal, I don’t think, about lying in your autobiography.  Free speech and all that.  If I wanted to write a book about how I am the reincarnation of Aethelred the Unready, I’m pretty sure that would still be within the rules.

Also, I don’t want to be too critical of the  young girl.  Most people are drunk when they lose their virginity.  However, I would like to point out that in my considered opinion, her story is bullshit.

First off, I believe she may well have been a bit drunk.  Camping and alcohol go together like sex and teenagers.  In fact, camping, alcohol, sex and teenagers frequently all go very well together.  But how many wine coolers do you have to drink to be so blotto that you sleep through sex?  I think that would require at least a half bottle of vodka for most healthy, young females, and maybe a couple of wine coolers to wash it down.  So, I think she’s either lying about the amount and type of alcohol consumed, or about not remembering getting boinked.

Although that would technically be date rape, and it would be a little weird if she didn’t break up with him right away, maybe even press charges, that’s actually the part I suspect she’s fibbing about.

Come on, Bristol.  You were on a camping trip with the guy.  Sleeping together in extremely confined quarters.  Out in the romantic wilds of nature.  Surely, you had to suspect that he might have sexual intentions?

But the main reason I don’t believe Bristol Palin is just because she has a history of blatant, in your face, outright lying, like that time she had cosmetic surgery and tried to claim it wasn’t cosmetic surgery.

Not that any of this is any of my business, of course.