Tag Archives: allen west and joe mccarthy

Teabagger wackadoodle 1st term congressman Allen West (R-FL) (ever noticed how the abbreviation for Republican from Florida looks a whole lot like “rolling on the floor laughing?) said at a recent town hall meeting that he believes plenty of Democratic congressman are actual, card carrying members of the Communist Party.  Really.  Literally.

Allen West

Moderator: What percentage of the American legislature do you think are card-carrying Marxists or International Socialist?

West: It’s a good question. I believe there’s about 78 to 81 members of the Democrat Party who are members of the Communist Party. It’s called the Congressional Progressive Caucus.

In fairness, he did say “I believe…” and not “I have in my hand the names of…” which is what former Wisconsin Senator Joseph McCarthy is remembered for.  Also, “I believe” gives him an easy out.  It doesn’t matter if he gets proved wrong.  There’s nothing illegal about any sentence which starts with the phrase “I believe…”

For instance, I believe that 78 to 81 Republican congressmen are closeted homosexuals.

I believe that 78 to 81 Republican congressmen have bank accounts that nobody knows about.

I believe that 78 to 81 Republican congressmen wear an earpiece so they can take direct instructions from Illuminati headquarters at all times.

I believe that 78 to 81 Republican congressmen have had sex with some non-human mammal at some point in their lives, most likely a cow.  I believe that, while in commission of this act, they have actually used the phrase “I love you.”

I believe that 78 to 81 Republican congressmen are functionally illiterate.

I believe that 78 to 81 Republican congressmen wear women’s underwear while they are at work on the house floor.  (this number excludes actual female Republican congresspeople)

I believe that 78 to 81 Republican congressmen have, at some point within the last 6 months, parked illegally in a handicapped space.

I believe that 78 to 81 Republican congressmen do not remember their children’s birthdays, exact ages or full names.

I believe that 78 to 81 Republican congressmen have masturbated while watching Sarah Palin speeches.

Of course, I have no evidence for any of these claims.  But neither does Allen West.