Tag Archives: track palin

Ustronie Morskie

Well, here we are in beautiful Ustronie Morskie, Coney Island on the Baltic, it’s sort of like Ibiza except that instead of hip young college kids from all over the world, you’ve got lots of Polish people with little kids and a sprinkling of Czechs and Germans.  I

Mercede and Bristol, back when they were still friends and before Bristol went all Michael Jackson with the plastic surgery

yelled at my daughter in English and a few people looked around curiously, like “what language is that?”

The sky is gray, it’s windy as hell and very unsummerlike but as we walked along the beach today I realized what a good thing that was.  We took a lovely, long walk along a relatively uncrowded beach  and I knew that the only reason it was uncrowded was because the sun wasn’t out.  I do hope we get in a few swimming days this vacation,  and I know the kids will be seriously bummed if  we don’t, but today was lovely.

Anyway, I’ve been off the internet for 2 days and the world hasn’t come to an end.  It hasn’t gotten any better – the Democrats failed to retake the state Senate in Wisconsin, and somehow Kathy Nicklaus had a hand in that again.  How the hell does she keep getting away with it?  Liberal pundits are trying to spin it as a liberal victory, but that’s bullshit.  They stole another one.

Mercede Johnston posed for Playboy, apparently, which raises two very interesting questions.  1. Does anybody buy Playboy any more? and 2. Why?  Don’t they have the internet?

Speaking of the Johnston-Palin clan,  Track’s wife Britta, who he married 3 months ago, gave birth to a baby girl, which confirmed what everybody suspected about the reason for their wedding.  Kyla Grace.  At least the girls in that family don’t get names like Track, Trig, and Tripp.

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Welcome to the Family

Regular readers of this column know that I occasionally enjoy a gentle gibe, a good natured ribbing of Sarah Palin (aka Bible Spice, aka Caribou Barbie, aka Snowbilly Grifter) , her snowmobiling husband Todd, their sex-abstaining, massive plastic surgery having, Dancing With the Stars daughter Bristol, the housebreaking, rave partying Willow (or is that Piper) and the two younger ones who we really shouldn’t be making fun of directly, although in one case I think it’s legitimate to raise questions of parentage.

However, that is  not the subject of today’s column.  There is joyous news in clan Palin, for oldest son Track has married Britta Hanson, his girlfriend from High School.  If pictures don’t lie, she is smoking hot, too.

So, welcome to the family, Britta!  I’m sure I will probably make fun of you at some point in the future, but I wish you nothing but joy on this day and a long and happy marriage, even though your husband is descended from lunatics, has a truly moronic first name and was ordered to Afghanistan by a judge because he got caught vandalizing school busses, but you know what?  No big deal, a high school prank and I must admit I was no angel myself at that age.  It’s not his fault that I have political objections to his mother.

He’s a fine looking young man, Britta, and I’m sure you have a lot in common and are very much in love.  Have a good life, and maybe

A Wedding is Always a Beautiful Thing

don’t run for public office.  Mazel Tov!

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