Happy Easter
Here in the Czech Republic, Easter is celebrated on Monday instead of Sunday. I’m not Christian and have never been a big fan of Easter. Sure, hunting for Easter eggs was fun when I was a kid. I also remember a farm we used to visit, some friends of my parents, really old people, or at least seemed so at the time, and every time we would come, they would send us out to the barn to find eggs because they just had a bunch of hens running loose who would lay anywhere and we thought that was amazingly cool fun. I just realized while writing this now that maybe they didn’t actually like kids very much and just wanted us out of the way. Also, the chocolate was cool but I hated the idea of getting all dressed up to visit our most boring relatives, which was how Easter afternoon was spent.
Later on, realizing the religious significance of the holiday, I began to like it even less. Except for Christmas, which has lots of cool pagan stuff like Santa Claus, an indoor tree, festive lights and presents, I see no reason whatsoever that anybody who is not a Christian should take Christian holidays seriously. I mean, we could celebrate the Spring solstice or equinox, I always get those too confused, or Beltane or something.
Anyway, I like Easter even less in the Czech Republic. The decorations are cooler than in the west. They really go all out on the eggs, and each one is a work of art. They also have an Easter tree, which is a live tree, usually a willow, outdoors, draped with lots of colored paper and hung with eggs. It looks nice. But they’ve got one tradition which is really obnoxious and sexist and anachronistic.
The boys and men all have Easter whips, little braided switches decorated at the handle end with colored paper, and they whip all the girls and women they can find, reciting a little rhyme, and then the girls give them eggs (traditional) or chocolate (more modern) or alcohol if they’re old enough(also traditional). It’s supposed to keep the women young forever.
I’ve been told that the version I’m seeing now is actually rather mild, that in the old days it seriously was a woman bashing festival. I don’t know. I’ve definitely seen some men who enjoy it in more than a healthy way.
Anyway, my wife and kids went up to the cottage to celebrate with her family, and I found excuses to stay home. Everybody’s happy.
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