Dear Aliens (or Highly Intelligent Extraterrestrial Beings, if you prefer)

Hoo boy, did you guys see this one?  Actually, I’m sure you see stuff like that all the time.  I’m not the first one to try and contact you.  It’s sort of like kids writing letters to Santa Claus, or to God, I guess.

Signaling the Aliens

Signaling the Aliens

Some of the crop circles which I, and a lot of other people, used to think were made by you guys until that was exposed as a hoax, are probably meant as signals to you guys.  Most, though, are just a bunch of college kids fooling around.  Pay no attention.

The fact that the Scientologists have a signal out for you is interesting, though, and it raises a couple of important questions.  1st, what is it with New Mexico?  I know, they’ve got a lot of air force bases there which could explain some of the sightings, but is there more?  Did one of your guys really crash land there back in the 50s?

More importantly, it raises the question of who are you going to talk to if you ever decide to communicate with human beings.  I really wouldn’t recommend the Scientologists.  They are considered a nutty religion and, bear in mind, that is on a planet absolutely full of nutty religions.

Lots of people think of Scientology as a cult, but the difference between a cult and a religion is about one generation, and Scientology is just about at that tipping point now.  So, we’ll see.

I also wouldn’t recommend meeting with the  Pope, Pat Robertson, any Ayatollah or even the Dalai Lama, although he seems to be a fairly cool guy.  There are thousands of religions on Earth, and they spend  a lot of their time arguing over which one is right.  Only one of them possibly could be-maximum- and there’s a very  good chance that they’re all wide of the mark.

I also wouldn’t recommend meeting with any of our government leaders.  First of all, most of them are totally corrupt, if not downright evil.  Some of them are pretty stupid, too.

We’ve got some pretty smart scientists.  A lot of great artists.  And the vast majority of the people are pretty decent sorts, most of the time.  What the heck, just pick somebody at random.

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