You’ve Got to Take Some Latitude With Your Platitude

There’s an old expression, it’s been in songs, and on T-Shirts, and now of course you see it, or some variation of it, every couple of days on facebook because, I guess, out of all the people in the world, there has to be somebody who’s just seeing it for the first time, and likely a lot of somebodies who’ve seen it before plenty of times but have the memory of goldfish: You can’t please everybody, so you just have to please yourself.
That sounds pretty obvious. Please yourself, and people who think like you will also be pleased.
But it was running through my mind today, as words often do, and the ending came out different, and I realized the message of this little platitude is not all cupcakes and sprinkles.
“You can’t please everybody, so why even try?”
Sounds a bit more negative, doesn’t it? Yet, essentially, that’s what it’s saying. Go ahead and please yourself. Grab that last piece of pie. Take the last seat on the bus, screw the old woman. Crank up the music, who gives a fuck what time it is. Please yourself.
Of course, “You can’t please everybody, but if you make a serious effort you could probably please most people and that would be a worthwhile goal because it would make the world a better place” might actually be a morally superior philosophy of life, but it isn’t quite as catchy.

I’ll close tonight’s blog with two news items: Morgan Freeman is a huge pothead! Which is cool, of course, because so am I, and I quite like his ‘Through the Wormhole’ show. Carl Sagan used to love his marijuana, too.

The Tiger Woods/Lindsay Vonn breakup is because she caught him cheating on her. Apparently, the Tiger is not changing his stripes.
When all is said and done, Tiger Woods will be remembered for two things, and one of them is golf.


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