A Place in the Country

For a long time I have dreamed about getting a place in the country to use as a language school. Partly because I’ve been frustrated as a teacher and blame, perhaps falsely, my students’ difficulties in learning English on the fact that they have one or two lessons a week, for an hour, which leaves them a lot more time to forget what they’ve learned than to learn and therefore, my theory goes, if I could get them for a week, learning all day every day, speaking English in the evening before going to bed and starting over again first thing in the morning, I might be able to force enough English down their throats that it would take them so long to forget it that they’d wind up remembering it.
We’ve had a few “English Weekends” here and there, renting a place and doing the best we could. 3 or 4 were successful, and 3 or 4 weren’t so much, and we haven’t done that for awhile.
Now the “The Shit Guru (an Expats Story) has been published, and the agreement between myself and the principal character as far as spending the profits is that all will go to setting up such a place, except that I would call it “Watson’s School of English” and he would call it “The Meditation Center of the Guru Sharab,” but that’s cool, a place can have more than one function.
It could happen. If everybody who reads this blog orders a copy and convinces twelve of their best friends to buy a copy, and they convince 12 of their friends to buy a copy and….we’d be able to set it up.
We went to look at a place today. It belongs to a friend of his who didn’t so much buy it as got stuck with it. It’s a totally derelict building, looks like it hasn’t been lived in for a decade, at least. There’s no glass in half the windows, the ceilings all look like they’re ready to fall in, there is mold on all the walls, the yard is full of trash, there are ladders in a couple of places there should be staircases, there is a balcony nobody dared step out on, and there’s no water or electricity.
I’m jazzed about it. It’s massive, it’s isolated, there’s enough yard space for a nice garden, and it’s in a pleasant, little town in a lovely area. We will see.

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