Former Arkansas Governor Mike “squirrel in a blender” Huckabee, the one whose son tortured a dog, has made a couple or seriously loopy statements this week, which leads me to one of two conclusions.
A. He’s running for president
B. He’s not running for president
Let’s examine the statements. First, he says that Obama was raised in Kenya, and that therefore his world view is colored by sympathy for the Mau Mau uprising.
First, he wasn’t raised in Kenya. Secondly, the Mau Mau rebellion, which began in 1952, was over by the time he was born in August of
’61. So, it could have colored his opinion, I suppose, in the same way that Huckabee’s opinion of the War Between the States is colored by being from Arkansas – that is, if Barack Obama had actually lived in Kenya at some point, or knew his father, which are two things he didn’t really do.
The second statement was in response to Natalie Portman’s acceptance speech at the Ocsar’s, which nobody else found even slightly controversial. Mike “evolution denier” Huckabee laid into her for being a mother before she’s married (they’re engaged), saying just all sorts of horrible things about single moms and sprinkling a little bit of racism on top.
Anyway, I think he might be running for president, and he’s settled on a strategy. Win the Teabaggers. That seems to be the strategy of most Republicans seeking the nomination. Palin, Santorum, Barbour, Gingrich and Pawlenty are all competing for that vote, and Huckabee knew he’d have to say something crazy to stay in the running.
Because he knows darned well that Obama wasn’t raised in Kenya.
And he knows darned well that Natalie Portman will be a better parent than him. Seriously, if a person’s kid hangs a dog and then beats it to death, that person (Huckabee) did less than a perfect job of parenting.
Which brings me to the 2nd theory: Huckabee is not running for president, and so can say whatever he damned well pleases. And what he pleases to say is pretty darned ignorant.

I agree! He is absolutely running for President. Or maybe not.