Category Archives: Blogs' Archive

Since both Canadian Thanksgiving and Columbus Day are celebrated on the 2nd Monday in October, they always fall on the same day of the month.  Amazing how that works out.  Of course, one is celebrated in Canada and one in the USA, so there’s no real conflict but, I suppose, if you are an American who feels guilty about celebrating a guy who raped and tortured and enslaved and murdered the American continent’s native peoples, you can always lay on a huge meal and just say you are celebrating Canadian Thanksgiving.  I’m sure our good neighbors to the north won’t mind.

I’m not saying Columbus was a great hero or anything, but I find it difficult to keep up with my fellow liberals in the outrage department.  Sure, Columbus was a nasty piece of work but so were a lot of other people of that time.  Ferdinand and Isabella, who bankrolled his trip, had roughly the same relationship with the Jews that Adolph Hitler would have, about 450 years later.  And, he gets credit for being a capable sailor and a fairly gutsy individual.  He did, in fact, boldly go where none had gone before.  And, for better or worse, American history starts with him.  (Canadian history, too, as far as that goes.  And South American history.  All of it.)

Also, it’s really not that much of a holiday.  Kids do not go door to door and get candy for Columbus Day, people do not put a tree in their living rooms, nobody  stays up until midnight drinking champagne and singing shmaltzy songs.  Some people might get a day off work, but that’s about it.  Are people complaining about getting a day off work?

Anyway, back to Canadian Thanksgiving, which is a purer Thanksgiving than American Thanksgiving because they didn’t slaughter their Indians as badly as we did ours (Canadian hands aren’t completely clean).  A big meal and expressions of gratitude are always good.

I, for one, am glad that Canada exists.  It is a reminder to the world that North Americans can be decent folk, when they are not busy trying to totally dominate the world.  And the Arrogant Worms are really funny.  We can forgive them giving the world Justin Bieber, because they also gave the world Mike Myers.

Shatner, too, but I’m not sure if that’s a point for or against.

Just watched Maleficent, so here are my observations.  First, we watched it at home, my daughter and I, while my wife and son yakked away in the kitchen.  I asked them to be quiet a couple of times and they did, for a while, but the volume always rose at the key points in the film.  How the hell do they do that?

These three were funny. Definitely among the film’s more interesting characters.

Anyway, I’m convinced this is the main reason people are willing to pay absolutely extortionist prices to see films in the cinema.  Everybody else in that cinema has also paid a significant amount of money to see the film, so everybody shuts the fuck up and watches the film.

At home, since nobody’s paid any money, people don’t give a shit.  People could have it great, the world could be a wonderful place, we could see all sorts of great movies for free, but we don’t.  We are our own worst enemies.

I liked the film fairly well, the story was interesting, the acting was good, but there were a couple of things which bothered me.  First, they are spending millions and millions of dollars on a film, they could have done a better job with Angelina Jolie’s costume.  Those horns looked like a bad Halloween costume.

Next, let’s move on  to the weak points in the plot.  Iron burns fairies, right?  So,  how is it she wasn’t more seriously messed up in the first big battle scene, when she has direct physical contact with lots of men in armor?  Then, how could evil shit Stepan manage to cut off her wings without waking her up?

Also, the way the wings got re-attached was a serious suspension of disbelief moment.

I quite liked the raven turned into a man character, and I thought he was going to be the surprise “true love’s kiss” because it was totally predictable that it wasn’t going to be the handsome prince, but I liked the way the writers handled that one.

Overall, I give it about a 6 (on a scale of 10).  Don’t spend money on it.  Don’t go into it with high expectations.  But, it has some good moments.

Supercalinihilisticthiscouldbeatrocious….or it could be bloody  brilliant.  There is a rumor going round that Tim Burton is going to do a Tim Burton  version of Mary Poppins.  Some papers are reporting it as fact.   Some are implying that it’s a hoax.  I do not know.  But I hope it’s true.

Lots of people, even those who think it might be true, think it’s a horrible idea.  Mary Poppins, if you are around the same age as me, was one of the most formative films of your childhood.  I remember the impact it had as well as I remember the film itself.  Everybody in school was talking about it.  I was desperate to see it.  My mom took me and my two younger brothers to see it, and we did not go to the movies all the time, like some of the kids.  Four tickets was a financial sacrifice, but she understood how important it was.

Everybody could say  ‘supercalifragilisticexpialidocious’ and did, repeatedly, ad nauseum.  There were other songs, but that’s the one everybody remembers.

People seem to think it’s  a bad idea because it was such a wholesome, sweetness and light movie and they’re a bit offended that someone should do a dark version.  Rubbish.  This might actually be closer to the book, to the original vision, than the Disney version, and it doesn’t matter anyway.  Film directors are entitled to interpret books in different ways – that’s art.

Also, let us not forget, there is generally an element of humor in Tim Burton films.

Will.I.Am.  I like your music.  I am a fan.  And I can  understand how frustrating it can be when your travel plans hit a snag.  But, you show up a mere 45 minutes in advance for an international flight, you might lose your seat.  They tell us commoners to show up 2 hours in advance.  I hope they at least got you a seat in business class.  Or on a later flight.  Or, at the very worst, that you had a pleasant flight in coach.  Yeah, 8 hours across the Pacific in coach can be a bitch but it is the way most of us fly.  It’s probably the way you flew before you were rich and famous.  It’s not the nightmare people make it out to be.  So, better luck next time, but I’m not too sympathetic to your anti-United tirade.

I have no idea what she is doing in this photo

Miley Cyrus.  I didn’t even read the article, but the headline said “Has Miley finally gone too far?” and my first thought was (because this is the way my mind works) “It’s sort of like the discussion about artificial intelligence.”

There really is a comparison here, bear with me.  How will we know when Miley has gone too far?  There is no Turing test to judge when a celebrity has crossed the line, has passed the point of no return.  It seems to me there’s no consistency, either.  Some stars say something a little bit off and everybody freaks out, while others can go on a drunken rampage, cursing about niggers and jews, and they keep on making movies and nobody worries about it too much.  You know who I’m talking about.

Some people would say that Miley passed the point of no return ages ago.  Some are still supporting her.  I’m fairly ambivalent.  I’ve got nothing against the girl and she is an advocate of legal marijuana, a cause dear to my heart, but I think her stage shtick is kind of gross and embarrassing to watch and her music is unexceptional.  As far as her public behavior, she’s nowhere near as bad as Lindsay Lohan, for instance.  Or even Winona Ryder.

Some would say we are already in the age of artificial intelligence.  One of my students was showing off his phone to me, with Siri.  Siri had a nice, sexy voice, and we were just two guys there, so I asked her how old she was, and a lot of dumb guy humor questions like that, and she said “I don’t see how that matters,” which is exactly, precisely what a real woman might have said.  She even sounded a bit annoyed.

Some will set increasingly high standards for artificial intelligence each time an old barrier is passed.

Same with Miley.  Each time she does something more outrageous, some people will say, “Eh, that’s nothing.”   And the bar will be raised.

The point of no return is always somewhere ahead of where we currently are.

Kim Jong un is incommunicado.  Kim Jong un is nowhere to be found.  Of course, this has prompted rumors that there has been a coup.  That may just be wishful thinking and this article from the Guardian, one of the few newspapers out there I still respect, thinks it’s nonsense because if there had been a coup, a lot of shit would be going on that isn’t going on, like maybe somebody would have announced that there’s been a coup and they’re in charge now, because usually when somebody’s pulled off a coup, they can’t wait to announce it.

Kim Jong un

They (the Guardian) reckon he’s got some health issues (the last time he was seen in public, in early September, he was walking with a limp) and doesn’t want to be seen at less than his best.  Must keep up a strong, healthy image, you know.  Weenie.

It’s all speculation at this point and, in the game of speculation, anything goes.  So, here are some possibilities and, if any of them prove to be true, I’ll be the 1st blogger to tell you so.

1.  There WAS a coup.  The Guardian, much as I love them, doesn’t know everything.  Coups are like snowflakes and fingerprints, no two are the same.  Maybe the plotters (i.e. the new government) have good reasons (staying alive?) for going slow and maintaining the status quo for a little while longer.

2.  He’s hanging with his buddy, Dennis Rodman, at an undisclosed location.

3.  Just taking some personal time.  Chill, people, it’s only been a month.

4.  Secret vacation to Switzerland.  Was spotted and overheard in a Zurich restaurant saying “Fuck this North Korea shit.  Why can’t I be sacred grand dictator for life of a cool country like, say for instance, Trinidad-Tobago or something?

5.  Tired of the damned paparazzi.  (I consider this one unlikely, because he could take the paparazzi out and have them shot, if there even was such a thing in NoKo.)

6. Giving his hair time to grow out.

7.  Finally realized that everybody is just laughing at him.

8.  Has put on about a million pounds from too many state dinners.

9.  Spending time in the studio, recording an album.

10. Kidnapped by aliens.  No idea why, but they are aliens.  Who can understand their motives.

Feel free to leave any other possibilities in the comments.