Remember, remember, the 5th of November
Gunpowder, treason and plot
I see no reason, that gunpowder treason
Today is Guy Fawkes day, aka Bonfire Night, aka British Halloween, and I apparently do not have enough British people on my facebook, or at least not enough who give a shit about the holidays, because here it is nearly midnight and I just realized what day it was.
Guy Fawkes, of course, is the guy who (allegedly) tried to blow up Parliament back in 1605, the one whose mask is worn in V for Vendetta. I say allegedly because I’ve got a little theory* about this.
Guy Fawkes (and the other 7 or 8 guys or so – rather like ‘the Midnight Ride of Paul Revere,’ he was just the one with the coolest name) was framed. The whole thing was a false flag operation.
Let us review. James I had been King barely 2 years, and was not getting anywhere near the love and respect Good Queen Bess, the blacktoothed pirate Queen, had from the English people. Quite honestly, most people thought he was a creampuff. (Yes, there were lots of jokes about him being effeminate, but he was a married man with plenty of kids. He wasn’t thought of as a strong leader, though.)
Like George W. Bush, he needed something to rally the people behind him. Also, he had this weird plan to write his own version of the Bible and sell a ton of copies because he was head of the Church of England and could get away with that.
So, he concocted a plot against himself, framed a bunch of people who were known to be Catholics, and Bob’s Your Uncle, established himself as a guy who took no shit and bravely escaped death and all.
There was no free press then. There wasn’t much press at all. Public information was pretty easy to control. Torture was a perfectly acceptable method of interrogation. It was a good time to be a king.
Actually, come right down to it, we have no idea how much of what we are taught as history is true and how much is not. How could we?
Anyway, that’s my rant for tonight. I hope all my British friends had great bonfires.
*it’s really kind of a dumb theory, and I’m not totally serious, but there’s no way to prove it wrong.