I was called a ‘court monkey’ today for supporting Jill Stein, which is an analogy I don’t quite understand. It’s more the adjective than the noun that I object to.
Monkeys are awesome. They are clever, they are communal, they are very human like. I know we are actually apes, not monkeys, but we’re all simians, so what the heck.
I remember in Malaysia I went to a park which was famous for it’s monkeys. First, I was having lunch at the cafe across from the park, and I was looking to not be sitting nearer to the outdoors. A man was having a sandwich, put it down for a second, and a monkey swooped in and got it. That’s pretty good thieving skills, but it’s nothing a gull can’t do, so doesn’t actually imply intelligence.
Then, as I was going into the park, I noticed a sign: It is strictly forbidden to feed the monkeys inside the park,’ and right below the sign (still just outside the park, mind you), there was a monkey with a begging look on his face that would make a hound dog proud. I’m certain he knew what it said on the sign, but I don’t know how.
Then, inside the park, there was a pack of monkeys and an old man, seemingly a local, who was yelling at them and waving his stick at them. They retreated, back up a hillside, and waited for him to leave, I swear I saw them laughing behind his back.
So, I like monkeys. But court monkey? Piss off, dude.